The reactive parent

I believe we all want to be good parents but what we hold in our heads and our hearts isn’t always in line with the behaviour we exhibit.

As parents, we hold fantasies of how our children should be based on our beliefs and past experiences.  And when things aren’t as we had imagined, we react.  Often we are not even aware of what triggers our reactions.

What are some of our fantasies?  ‘My child will be the best athlete or the smartest student.’  ‘My child will not be sick or hurt.’  ‘My child will not fight with siblings or friends.’  ‘My child will do as I say.’ ‘My child will eat all the right foods.’ ‘My child will be popular.’  The list goes on.  Although these items are very general, it is our unique past experiences that create energy structures that dictate our reactions.

How do we feel when they are not the superstar we imagined or our children do not match our fantasy of how they should behave?   We experience emotions of shame, guilt, fear or anger.   As a parent, I have certainly experienced reactions that were not appropriate for the occasion.  I have tried yoga, meditation and exercise to be less reactive.  I get lots of sleep and eat healthy.  I recognize that I am more apt to lose my cool when I am tired and hungry, such as when I used to pick up the girls at day care after a long day at work.  Keeping my body and mind strong is important but very predictably, certain events triggered very similar reactions each time.  No matter how deep the breath I took, my rational thought was pushed to the background.

Here is where LOGOSYNTHESIS® has been unique and an extremely effective tool for me.  Stress management tools work at controlling my stress.   LOGOSYNTHESIS® presents a very simple, unique system that effectively dissolves the energy that triggers my stress.  Through a series of sentences which retrieves my energy and remove energy that doesn’t belong to me, the energy structure is dissolved so there is no longer anything to trigger my reaction. The technique allows me to effectively neutralize my reactions!

I have come to realize that I hold many fantasies about how I ‘should’ parent my children.  I also realize that my reactions to the fact that reality does not match these fantasies cause me and my family stress.  I haven’t been able to dissolve all the triggers with one set of sentences but I am more aware of my reactions as they occur.  I periodically find quiet time to explore what happened and use LOGOSYNTHESIS® to clear my energy.  For me, it has been fascinating to experience the results and although I still have triggers to work on, I have noticed some remarkable shifts both myself and my children.   Check out The Stress of Parenting for an interesting example of the application.  The results are intriguing and fascinating!