Acknowledge my situation
I am parenting in the pandemic. I am living in extraordinary times. My life is not normal. I am not in control of the world around me. This can feel uncomfortable and even painful at times. As a parent, I feel additional pressure because I am concerned for my children. I may want to change the world to make it safer and more supportive for them. This can take tremendous energy. I have come to appreciate that there is power in learning to change how I respond to the world. My children benefit.
Notice my reactions
When parenting in the pandemic, I take time to notice my reactions. My thoughts, emotions and body sensations provide me with information to let me know what is bothering me. For example, I have two daughters who were graduating high school during the pandemic. I know that graduation is an important time. I have a wish that my children could have a normal graduation. Therefore, I feel sad and disappointed. I wish I could celebrate with them. Also, I think they should be able to have a very special day.
Resolve my reactions
My traditional response to parenting in the pandemic would be to act on my thoughts and emotions. I would do something. I would work hard to give my children the special day that they deserved. Instead, I use Logosynthesis, developed by Dr. Willem Lammers, to process my reactions so I can feel calm and focused. The method is fast and easy. It is structured so I can simply connect with what bothers me and identify the perceptions that trigger these reactions. I then apply three specific sentences to shift the energy that is stuck in the triggers. The thoughts and emotions that bother me disappear.
Take action
My initial reaction is to take action. I now pay attention to my reactions and try to resolve the triggers before I act. I don’t always catch myself and that’s ok. But now I am certainly aware that when I resolve my reactions, I feel calmer and more focused. This allows me to see alternatives. I can pause to ask my children what they would like to to do celebrate their graduation. Instead of big celebrations, we marked the occasion with a special piece of jewelry and took fun photos. Also, we were able to get together with friends and family within the guidelines. We recognized that we missed out on some of the excitement but nevertheless, we were thankful that we were safe and healthy.
Enjoy the moments
The spring of 2020 was not a normal time for graduations but it was a special time because our family had the opportunity to spend wonderful time together. Of course, we miss the wonderful activities around our extended family, friends, school and sport. We enjoyed different times such as family meals, movie nights and games. We continue to move forward. My children look forward to the next step in their education. And their next graduation.
Find your moments
Parenting in the pandemic is challenging. Our challenges vary depending on many things: the age of our children; our family structure; our work situation; our financial position; our living space and so on. When we learn to take time to acknowledge our situation and recognize our automatic response, we can use the Logosynthesis® method to feel more calm and focused. This is what our children notice and this alos, is what influences how our children respond. Taking time to shift reactive behaviour can support your parenting in the pandemic and beyond. Your children will thank you.
Use this guided protocol to feel calmer and more focused during the coronavirus pandemic:
Get started to develop your parenting skills
Check out these resources to get you started. You can also watch the guided video below to experience what can shift. Firstly, grab a glass of water and find a quiet, uninterrupted place. Allow at least 30 minutes so that you are not rushed. And then, simply follow my guidance on the video. Energy shifts can feel subtle or intense, so take some time to notice what shifts over the next few days and weeks. Enjoy!